Uno means "more than one"

The card game Uno is fast becoming a favorite over at the orphanage down the street. After we tackle the English homework, we play cards. Lydia loves to help too, and she even has helped with the homework by listening to the kids read their texts.

I (Diana) brought Uno because most Russians already know it, and to play "in English" requires colors and numbers, but not much more. I figured that Uno would hold their attention for only a couple of sessions. But, as in so many situations with these orphans, I was wrong. Not only do they request Uno each week, but we also end up talking about more personal issues as the game progresses.

The boys' group made a rule that Lydia and I will play in Russian, and they will play in English. I countered with a rule that if any of them speak in Russian, they must take a card for every Russian word uttered. Little English knowledge + no Russian rule = very quiet room. We laugh about that equation. My card shuffling techniques bumped me up the respect ladder a rung or two as well. I just might be training casino dealers now!

Updates:
Andrei continues to open up about his background and current interests. He's curious about me too. Consequently, I know him the best of the boys. He may be only one in that group that wants to relate, but Uno is a big number to God.

Masha has acted more somber and depressed in the past few weeks. She hangs around after her session and seems to want to talk more. The kids are on fall break next week, and orphans with a family member will leave for a few days. Masha has nobody. I asked if she wanted me to come back next week just to hang out. She readily agreed. Uno.

Natasha, the breakthrough from a few weeks ago, continues to try to speak English, and our trust is building. She also will not go to any relatives next week, and I plan to meet with her as well. Uno.

The director has given us permission, for the first time, to actually take Masha and Natasha out for a while, so we are excited to see how God will work when we have more time with them outside the home.

Uno at a time.

Deeper relationships at the orphange

Three weeks ago I resumed my English tutoring at the orphanage down the street. Last school year's experience held some beautiful moments with these teens, but there were as many difficult times managing the dynamics in the group as well. Even though my Russian is much improved, I knew that if I were to be effective and really get to know these kids, I needed to divide and conquer.

The director allowed me to teach "one-on-one" in smaller blocks of time per my suggestion. It just wasn't as effective in a group setting, I said. The one-on-one quickly became two-on-one, and then when I arrived the first day, they snuck three-on-one with the boys, but who's counting. The smaller groups have worked extremely well, and in just three weeks, I have learned more about these kids and experienced some breakthroughs in our relationships. Lydia continues to join me, and with the smaller groups, can participate more.

Here are three snapshots.

Masha: You might remember Masha from a previous blog of mine. She's 13 with a dark affect and sour attitude towards any authority or academic subject. Masha is still dark, but she and I came to an understanding and parted in May as "friends". We picked up right where we left off, and now she has even decided to try speaking a little English. She cracks a smile every now and then and seemed to appreciate my offer to find her the lyrics to the English rock songs she listens to on her MP3 player. Masha hangs around after her lesson and sometimes returns later. She and Lydia are becoming well acquainted too.

Andrei: I secretly hoped the director had other boys in mind for this year. But no, Andrei, 14, was the first face I saw. He was lewd and rude when I first met him last winter, but removing girls from the situation has allowed him to focus on his English homework and give him the freedom to ask me questions about myself and Lydia. Andrei is a tough nut. He reeks of cigarette smoke, talks about drugs and beer, and handles himself like he's ready to fight. But, as I approached the orphanage on week 2, Andrei ran up to me and waved with a shy smile. Progress.

Natasha: I was wrong. Natasha, 14, is reachable! Up until today, I thought Natasha and I would make little, if any, progress in English and in our relationship. Her body language screams apathy and "bug off!". When her lesson partner Anya did not show up today, I had 30 minutes alone with Natasha, and those 30 minutes started out like all others:

Me: How are you today, Natasha? (English)

N: gives quizzical look

Me: How are you today? (English)

N: flops down in a chair and buries head in arms

Me: How are you, Natasha? (now in Russian)

N: terrible!

Ready for the miracle? Today Natasha and I parted with hugs and smiles! How did this happen?

We started the English homework (safety tips for parents, of all things) and after slogging through phrases that she can only parrot and does not understand ("Put the knives away after use"), we started really talking. Okay, it was in Russian, but after "Cover all electrical sockets", can you blame us?

We learned that we are both only children, and that we both always wanted an older brother. Natasha started to lighten up. I ventured to ask about her mom and dad, since most of these kids are social orphans and usually maintain some kind of visitation. As crusty as Natasha can be, she opened up about her family revealing that her mother was killed (with N there) and her father is a drunk. She only sees him sometimes, but she is fond of her grandmother. I queried her about who she looks like, and Natasha offered to show me her mother's picture next week. I was touched to say the very least.

When I ended our session, Natasha seemed -- softer. I gave her a quick one-armed hug, but she leaned into me and hugged me back with both her arms around my waist. She waved me a sweet "little girl" wave before heading down the hall. I shut the door to the room and cried.