Vienna waited for me

I spent two semesters living and studying in Vienna back in 1984 and 1987 through a program with the Duke Wind Symphony. I made lifelong friends with the students and our director, and I got to know and love the city dearly. It, like St. Petersburg, is a cultural center. In fact, I spent the summer of 1987 in Leningrad (now Petersburg), and almost immediately turned around and spent the fall in Vienna.

So it was ironic that the first city we would go to from Petersburg was Vienna. Our agency has a conference almost yearly for all staff in Europe in a different location. This year Sopron, Hungary was choosen. We and the kids decided to fly in and out of Vienna (less than an hour away) and get in a little bonus vacation time on either side (though only 1 and 2 days, respectively).

So some pictures are in order:

Our first breakfast was at a classic Viennese restaurant that the lady at the hostel suggested to us. Turn of the century feel with Strauss waltzes in the background, and cheap but great food.

Afterwards, we saw strolled through downtown and just had to get some ice cream right outside St. Stephen's Cathedral. Kerith is so tickled because we didn't even get lunch.

After another long hike past many a historical site, nothing but fountain water (literally) from a monumental source in the city park would hit the spot.

At the end of the week, we came back through with our teammates, the O'Byrnes. Here you see us crashing in the Volksgarten after yet another long hike through the city. It was a glorious and invigorating crash, though.











Diana and I had to pose and look couple-y too.








They had an incredible playground at Schonbrunn.

Lyle flew a bird.


The best part of the whole time was the protracted opportunities for informal, fun, and simple social times getting to know better and bond with the O'Byrne's. We are so glad that God put us together with them, and amazed at how well He paired us.

Here we are just shooting the breeze over some great Austrian food at a hidden local joint that the same hostel worker sent us to. On point!

Educational About-face

I came here certain that we still needed to homeschool our kids. We both have strong convictions about that subject, so the only remaining question was how to get them into the culture to learn the language, etc. It didn't take me long to realize that playing on the playground is good, but an excruciatingly slow process, particularly for the boys, who aren't as outgoing as Lydia.

Diana had already been thinking a lot about sending the boys to a local school part-time, but I was not comfortable with the idea. Then we found out through my new close associate here, Pastor Sokolov (I need to do an entry on the great things God is doing there) that their church has a Christian school, and it sounded like a possible fit.

We met this week with the director. They have only 2 slots left in their kindergarten (In Russia kindergartens are up to age 7) and our boys would round out the class of 10. We asked many questions about the routine, instructors, curriculum, etc, and were pleased with the answers. We can also pretty much "write our own ticket" in terms of how long the boys stay each day and how many days each week they attend! Some children stay from 9 am - 6 pm! We would only have the boys participate in the morning activities and perhaps not every day. It is affordable for us as well. In a word, we could hardly ask for more.

We told them "yes" today, and we really feel good about it. Our goal is for the boys to get a good foundation in Russian, make some friends, and begin to get inside the culture they are called to serve. I'm actually excited about how it will transform them and give Diana and Lydia a great chance to catch up on some things that Lydia is behind on.

Faith and finding a home

The last time we looked at moving was nearly 12 years ago. Not only were our needs vastly different from what they are now, we were vastly different people. Now I am growing in my understanding that a home is more than finding a fit between finances, the amenities, and desire. I’m beginning to see that in every aspect of the process of settling on a home, there is a spiritual dynamic. Allow me to process this question “out loud,” as it were, with you.

How we search. In the very process of searching for a new home, there are spiritual dynamics. How much do we “pound the pavement” vs. let our contacts (including friends, Realtors, and e-groups) bring them to us? The question isn’t how passive to be, as though God were going to do it all for us without effort. It’s just that there comes a point when effort becomes fretting because of the deadline to find something or fear that nothing will materialize. Maybe I can say that we need to not leave any stone unturned that lies in the path that God has us on. We need discernment about the path so we don’t bother with stones that are outside it.

What we need. It goes without saying by now that we aren’t here in Russia to live high on the hog, or even really nicely. We don’t even struggle, in principle, with the truth that we want only to have in a home that which God wants us to have. For example, would we like to live in a cool, 19^th century building with parquet floors and high ceilings? You bet, and there are a ton of them around in the center of the city. But they can be expensive too, and may have other detractors, so we have laid that one down as a goal. A harder one is how much green to have nearby. Not merely are parks esthetically pleasing, but, more importantly, they are a place for the kids to play, since they have to give up a yard moving here. Or do they? Should we look for an actual free-standing house so we can also be able to host better?

Here’s a more fundamental question: how much do we predetermine vs. decide when we have an option on the table? No doubt you will say, “you have to start with your non-negotiables.” I assure you, even those are very hard to determine. About all we can say there is:

1. it has to have 4 rooms or more;
2. it has to be affordable within our budget.

Other variables include:

• location in the city
• near a metro or not
• near our teammates or not
• near the center or not
• near a park or not
• to purchase or rent

Interestingly enough, we are both in agreement about a preference for being near a metro, our teammates, in the center, near a good park. We have not yet come to agreement about purchasing, as this has its own highly complex implications.

Moreover, we were able to come to agreement to pursue one home we saw (see my last post) that was for sale because as a package deal, we could see that it was a good choice for us, even though it was missing some of our preferences.

The spiritual implications are in how much we limit our field of vision in faith that God is calling us to x, y, or z, or do we trust God to provide the home that we can receive in faith, despite whatever it’s apparent limitations?

What we believe. Each of these paths implies a certain conviction about who God is and how He works in our lives. Does God want to bless our socks off with a home that not only testifies to His hand on us and so that we can have a place where we can settle in for the long haul? Many stories have I heard about missionaries who lived a Spartan and supposedly incarnational lifestyle to be like the locals but who didn’t last long because it was too hard for them. One non-negotiable for me is that Diana has to be at peace with the final decision. She is struggling with how much God wants to challenge her to let go of the desires of her heart to serve Him single-mindedly. She desires green, but is it an idol? I don’t think so. A partial answer, it seems to me, is that God constructed her to revere beauty and nature, but He may have creative ways of providing the green.

The more I write, the more I am coming to the conclusion that the more questions we have, the more we need to let God do the leading instead of us determining the outcome ahead of time. My theme verse of late has been, “I will lead the blind in the way they do not know.” Isaiah

God will show us the home. He has it prepared in advance for us. This much I know.

Apartment hunting

Our current apartment is close to perfect for our needs (see pics), so we we're wondering how God is going to work out our permanent location. This temporary place has three large bedrooms, is fully furnished, and is in the old city, not too far from our teammates, the O'Byrnes.
They even have a bunch of videos to keep us from getting too homesick and exercise equipment. The ceilings are really high, and the building has a lot of character, being well over a hundred years old.



We have had very little success so far in even being able to look at other options. A search through the papers and online has gotten us nowhere.

Most folk do things here the old fashioned way, by word of mouth. Trouble is, word has only found us one place, and it is for sale, but it is a very interesting option.

This new possibility is a 3-bedroom place being vacated by much older missionaries who have been here since '92 and are either leaving the city or the country - haven't decided. Their heart is to bless another missionary couple by selling it below market value without the use of a Realtor to save fees, etc. We're talking about $32,000 off the street value here.

We had looked into buying an aparment several months back, but it didn't go anywhere, and our current temporary option came up as a perfect solution that would allow Diana to be a part of the decision-making process when we got around to finding something permanent. So, what about this apartment for sale?

Pluses: The apartment is extremely well maintained and fixed up to nearly US standards. It looks very attractive inside, and all the furniture (very nice stuff) conveys. There are two balconies that can be used for plants, extra storage space, and/or fixed to be additional living space (like an office). The grounds are nice, and very large, with lots of grass and nice play equipment for the kids. This is almost unheard of here in the center of the city.

Minuses: It's not in the center, which is a bummer from the perspective of aesthetics. The buildings in the city center are SO cool. Those buildings out there look like the Soviet Union. It's also further from our teammates, making community with them harder.

Moreover, how are we going to pay for it? The price is almost what we sold our house in VA for, and loans are really tough to find here. (Our house in VA has yet to close, by the way.) Ideal would be a generous benefactor(s). Second best would be a group of folk who partner together to offer us a private loan. This has been done with some other missionaries, so I'm looking into this now.

I welcome all comments and ideas.

August 9th update: I called today to talk about buying the apartment, and it has already been claimed. The general impact on me has been a strengthening of my resolve to buy if the Lord will make it possible.

We have lived in our new home for almost a week now. Our comfort zones are widening as we explore and experience life in St. Petersburg. Coming home from a visit to outside of the city today, our temporary apartment started to feel like a home base. What more have we learned this past week? Here’s a recap:

Shopping. Our teammate, Priscilla, and I (Diana) visited the farmer’s market, called the Ree` nok, in the city center on Saturday. Markets of other cultures are some of my favorite places, and this was no exception. I enjoy browsing the fresh produce, cheeses, and spices. Prices were a bit lower than in the large “Okay” grocery store. Priscilla steered me through the bustling crowds and narrated her experiences. This was invaluable, since I had no idea which “fruit lady” has the best reputation. I was pleased that my Russian was good enough to make purchases, but Priscilla was there to bail me out when I got stuck on anything more than simple transactions.


The Internet. Lyle had a true Russian experience this weekend in trying to get Internet hook up at the apartment. He took along Lydia and Kerith for the Metro rides with the intent of visiting the DSL store to pay up the account and get it activated. Of course, it wasn’t that simple. The Metro line was closed for 3 stops, which he didn’t know until he arrived at the station. No problem, just go around the closed stations with a few extra rides, and then it will be all smoothed out. Right? Wrong. After a very circuitous route, my three heroes found the store, but it was closed! The bright spot of the journey was a huge container of wild raspberries purchased to keep hungry tummies happy. The price? About $2.50. In the US, the same amount would sell for no less than $10.

Kids. Lydia has now played twice with a girl, Nastia, who she met at the nearby playground. This pleased Lyle and I greatly, and makes Lydia feel that “Russia isn’t so bad.” Today (Tuesday) she met a few more girls on our outing to the country when we visited a Russian pastor and his family. Lydia is very motivated to speak, and her good ear with music helps her with proper Russian pronunciation.

Kerith and Simon just play with kids. It doesn’t seem to matter to them that there is a language barrier. Simon walked right up to a boy at a park on Friday and asked, “Why don’t you speak English”? Kerith is good about saying “thank you” and “good-bye” in Russian, and, in fact, he picks up on many words and surprises us later by translating at the dinner table.


Outing to the country. On Tuesday we tackled the Metro as a family on our way to visit the Igor Sokolov family. It’s about a 25-minute walk to the Metro station from our apartment, but the stroll allowed us to see another part of the city and enjoy the many beautiful buildings and canals. After a few station stops, Igor met us with his van for the rest of the trip to his house.

Igor and Angela have three lovely girls, the eldest 11 and the youngest 3 ½. Lyle had met Igor in VA at a coaching conference and then again when he visited St. P in March. I have been looking forward to meeting this family since then. We had a wonderful visit and found many similarities in values and goals, including education and ministry. It’s exciting to see how God has brought us into relationship and where He will lead.

Touchdown St. Petersburg!

I’m sitting at the dining room table writing to you while supper is cooking. Lyle is out with the kids at a playground. Sounds just like a page from our American life, right? Perhaps so, but since our arrival about 48 hours ago, so much has happened that I barely recognize our life from the States. Hopefully the next few pages and pictures will give you a peek into our first couple of days in our new hometown of St. Petersburg, Russia.

Flights. Our flights on Tuesday and Wednesday were blessedly uneventful. Even a late departure from Washington, DC did not cause us to miss our connection in Munich. We only had time to hit the restrooms before boarding, however. The kids were troopers during the flights. Lyle sat with Kerith, and I sat between Lydia and Simon in the middle row of the plane. My original seat would not recline, and we were reseated several rows back. The flight attendants were delightful and kind to the kids, which made a big difference to us. Thankfully, Simon slept most of the longer flight, which allowed me to grab some shuteye too.

The flight from Munich to St. P was only 2 ½ hours, and at 4 pm we landed in St. P. Lydia and I had a window this time and marveled at the expanse of the Bay of Finland as we approached the airport. After we passed through passport control in St. P, our luggage was practically waiting for us in one big pile! All 13 pieces arrived with only minimal damage to a few of the suitcases. Another surprise was our team leader, Bill O’Byrne, who met us with a cart for the luggage. He surreptitiously skirted the customs officials to meet us.

Arriving. A Russian pastor friend of Lyle’s, Igor, also met us in the parking lot to help schlep our worldly possessions to our temporary apartment. The main avenue from the airport is well maintained with copious quantities of blooming flowers – orange marigolds by the thousands and hanging baskets of purple Petunias. This is the first impression for the foreigners, so the officials work to keep this street particularly attractive. It’s been 10 years since my last visit to Russia, and the western influence is immediately evident in the types of shops and restaurants (Sushi bars!)

Apartment. Our temporary living quarters in the apartment of some American missionaries home for the summer. We will stay here until we find a place of our own, or until Oct 1, whichever comes first.

The sidewalk in front of the building has construction in the form of a wide, deep ditch, so the workers had to bring over a board for us to cross over with the luggage. Welcome to Russia. The entryways to apartment buildings usually are rough and primitive. I call it “early rubble era”. Ours is no exception; however, the stairwells and elevator (think college dorm after a partying all night and very tiny) are not indicative of the apartments they lead to.

We are blessed to have 3 bedrooms. Lydia does not have to share with the boys and has already started decorating with her treasures brought from Virginia. There are usually young children living here, and the kids are enjoying using the many toys and books. The rooms are large and the kitchen well equipped. There is no a/c, but only when the sun shines in directly do we turn on fans.

White nights are at their peak early in July, but the sky still stays light until rather late, and it is dark by 2 am. (Ask me how we know this! LOL) We are starting to turn around our days and nights, and it’s amazing that the kids are sleeping as much as they are. I expected their bodies to still be on ET for a while longer.

O’Byrnes. Oh, where do I start? Bill and Priscilla and their 4 children, Gillian, 13, Karina, 10, Liam, 7, and Olivia, 1, are our lifeline right now. They have lived here for about 14 years, and they seem to know just what we need and when. Priscilla stocked us with provisions for a few days, including wonderful breads, muesli, fruit, and yogurt. Yummy. It was dinnertime when we arrived, and after a quick primer on the gas stove, they left us to acclimate. Dinner and 5 baths later, we hit the sack.

Thursday. Our first full day in St. P we all slept until noon. J After a wonderful breakfast, thanks to Priscilla, we tried to find all the necessities in the luggage. When underwear is packed with math curriculum, and shirts are with the CD’s, it takes some rummaging to get dressed. In the afternoon, Bill and the O’Byrne kids picked us up in their van for an outing along the waterfront to view some of the historical treasures of our new city.

Simon’s comment. After our history lesson and tour of the waterfront, we retired to the O’Byrne’s for dinner. As we started trudging up the 5 long flights of concrete stairs to our apartment, Simon asked, “Why are we coming back here again?” We all chuckled, but the laughter fizzled to introspective hmmm’s. Secretly we were all thinking the same thing, “Yeah, what are we doing here?”

Friday. Priscilla and oldest daughter Gillian took Lyle, Simon, and I to the large western-style grocery store called “Okay”. It’s more than okay, let me tell you. I had to avoid looking at the non-food section just to keep my sanity. Lyle had warned me of this because he had toured this store during his visit to St. P last March. Priscilla patiently escorted us through the aisles and helped us select a cartful of groceries. Our total? 2,371.97 rubles. (25 r. = $1). The most expensive item was Olive Oil and the cheapest – stuffed bliny (stuffed crepes) at 3.90 rub each.

After 2 hours of shopping, I was ready to have anybody just put food in the cart for me. Deciphering all the ingredients and making decisions began to overwhelm me. How funny, an American tired of choices. The store was huge and the selection vast. Priscilla will take us to the farmer’s marker (Ree` nok) tomorrow for spices, dried fruits, and grains.

Friday afternoon playground.
Now Lydia has a story! She has been nervous about meeting Russian children because of the language barrier, but anybody who knows Lydia knows she has a gift for making friends of any age, size, and background. Nothing like Russian was going to stand in her way. At a nearby playground, three girls, ages 10-early teens, befriended Lydia and included her in some ball games. Lyle was on hand to help with translations. She was beaming when she came home having learned that she CAN make friends. The girls have asked when Lydia would be coming again!

The stuff

Sitting out on the lawn at 6am the morning of our yard sale, Diana held her coffee pensively and mused, "Life is just a bunch of junk." We could not believe how much stuff we had accumulated over the last 11 years in this house. It covered all the way from one end of the property to the other, poised on 13 tables, a 30 foot ladder, and several tarps. Didn't we purge regularly? Didn't we have a modest lifestyle? We sure couldn't have ever afforded to do otherwise, we thought, living on a ministry income.
We got rid of a little more than half of our stuff that day. We gave some more away. We have some more items to sell (go here). We took a trailer of stuff we "couldn't part with" to my parent's house in Georgia. Some more boxes are at Diana's parent's. We are taking about a dozen suitcases with us, and asking some folk to bring one or two later. All told, that's a lot of stuff.
Turns out we are rich. We are fabulously rich compared to the kids we want to serve. It actually feels good to get rid of all of that excess baggage, as it were. Try it some time. We sure didn't need those extra several thousand pounds of stuff as much as we thought we did.
The average income in St. Petersburg is about $300-400/month. And that despite the fact that the city is now rated the 12th most expensive city in the world to live in (above Paris, Singapore, and New York!). Talk about living in paradox - "Water, water everywhere, nor any drop to drink."
Like any missionary, we will have the inevitable challenge of navigating the path between having what we "expect" in a lifestyle, and what the people we serve have. On the other hand, the cost of living will keep pretty strict controls over what we can get anyway. But this is good. We want to relate at least a little bit to those kids. They're blessed if they have a home. "Home is where, when you go there, they have to take you in."